Anxiety

This is me and my long-standing, protective, often-brother-like friend James. I've known James since somewhere around the 4th or 5th grade, and we've been such fast friends for some vast majority of the time. This picture was taken some 7 years ago, when we were both juniors in high school. This picture was taken before James joined the Marine Reserves.

Some of you might ask why I'm blogging about my friend James when Christmas has just passed and I have so many yarn-and-fiber related things to blog about.

James is going to war.

Now, James has been deployed several times during his time in the Marines. Each time he left, it's been hard on his family and friends. The other times that James left he went to places away from the war, but there was always this anxiety that spoke over my mind...is he okay...will he come home...what if something happens... Every time that anxiety spoke too loudly, a voice of logic came, speaking like a preminotory Greek Fate...he's fine....he will come home...nothing will happen. Each time, that voice of logic was enough to calm me down, because let's be reasonable here, he wasn't actually in the line of anything that could harm him.

I'm afraid that voice of logic has faltered a little bit.

I won't get to see James again before he leaves, I saw him yesterday and ate dinner with him and a new friend he introduced me to Kae, who I will write more in depth about at another time. Tomorrow James leaves, and I will not be able to see him again for quite some while. Each time James has left before, it was more like we just said, 'see ya around', or 'goodnight, we'll see eachother later'. This time it wasn't like that, I could tell he was worried, which worried me.

It's getting late, and I keep waiting for Atropus to speak to me.